Songs from Westgate

2003-05-03T02:09:00.000-04:00

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http://www.livejournal.com/users/aliaswestgate/

2003-05-03T02:05:00.000-04:00

I just got a LiveJournal a few weeks ago.....here's the LINK i think i'll be staying there from now on.
http://www.livejournal.com/users/aliaswestgate/

Sorry i couldnt' entertain ya as well on this one, but...oh well! Enjoy the LJ, i know i am.

2003-03-19T23:39:00.000-05:00

Why NOW?
Gods, the Shrub has done it this time. Issued The Ultimatum, and of course Saddam aint' leaving..he's had over 12 yrs to get thouroughly entrenched there. This whole situation sucks, to put it bluntly. Hussien has done nothing agressive in 12 yrs, and Bin Laden and his leftover cronies are more of a threat than Iraq at this point. N Korea is more of a problem too. This is why i hate politics, i can vote all i want but it does shit to change the world when we can't get rid of the wrong leader right away. I don't mean saddam either.
I"m not against america as a whole, i just disagree vehemently with Dubya's idea of foreign policy. "You are either with us or against us.' Does not a happy dialogue make!
I'd be talking Saiyuki this time, but i'm royally pissed off ....for obvious reasons. I didnt' like the first Gulf War simply cause i was 13 at the time and didn't get it, i like this one even less than that one now at 25 because i know most of the situation and can guess on the political aspect. I'll say it again---THIS SUCKS!
If i could go afford to go to a protest i would, but i think i'm gonna find a local reps public email addy and be quite eloquent in that message. Maybe if enough of us do that, we can get the point through....the common americna citizen does not like this war dammit. Enough for now, we'll see what the dawn brings.

2003-03-10T01:49:00.000-05:00

Oh man, it's been a fun few weeks.
Lesse, found a place ot rent and buy all the anime in that i could want. Seemed to have found a new friend too, another Angie. She's the first one i talked to when i walked into Magnum Opus(that's the place) for the first time. Pretty much spent the time drooling over all the pretty boys in anime that we like. She's got me beat when i comes to actual series watched, since she's gotten access to more stuff---including bootlegs!!!!!! ARGH!
Either way..all i've done is watched a few new things and caught up with 2 of my fave series. I did see a great little character drama thats more 'shojo' which is 'girl's anime' than anything else. Sweet show, and much more complicated than it looks. Then i've spent the this last weekend rewatching Gundam Wing uncut....which is basically enough to make anyone's eyes pop out. Bishounen everywhere....particluarly the the smiling God of Death himself...Duo :D *drools a bit*
That made me read some interesting fanfictions though, particularly with all hinted boy/boy action in Gundam Wing, got a few ideas of my own for it too. The only thing is, is that reading the fiction brought out my own lonelyness a bit, which passed...thank goodness!
Then i watch Slayers:Next tonight..finished THAT bit of episodes off, and next weekend...Slayers:TRY *yay bounce bounce*
Sorry....i've got Slayers on teh brain, particularly Gourry. He's the real Bishie of Slayers, but he's great....fun loyal, and a badass with a sword. My kinda guy.
Anyway..i'm a bit tired and i'm off to bed in a few minutes....i'll muse a bit more when i'm more awake!

2003-02-09T01:31:00.000-05:00

Two weeks later, and everything has changed again. I love my life sometimes!
I was at work last week, slogging my way through mandatory overtime, and things started getting weird. We managed to have 2 resignations and at least 1 firing of permanent employees in the course of 4 days. Not fun, particularly when i was hoping to get hired into that office. That friday they called my temp agency and told me not to come in, since i was getting my car fixed that day--and it took all friggen day to get done too!
Nice to finally come home after arguing with mechanics to find out 'oh your contract's been severed because of management changes'. Lovely eh?
Anyway i got lucky, within a half hour of getting that first call from my temp agency i got another call. This one with a new prospective contract. This one temp to hire. Same decent wages and full time :D I was to start the coming monday. Good thing too. I"m still swamped in med bills from that asthma attack.
So far, i'm liking it. I get to work with an old microfilm machine and scanner, and CD-Roms. Pretty much look up old deeds and titles, various land contracts and stuffs. It's interesting to say the least. I've gotta be active too, since i spend about half my time physically chasing down these files or putting them back after i make paper copies.
Another good thing is that i've no limit on how long i can work until. I'm obligated to work until 5pm, but i can stay till 7pm if i really want to. Mostly depends on how energetic and stubborn i'm feeling about keeping my workload reasonable. For now i'm working on accuracy in these things and not so much speed. I've got time to get good though.
40 hours for simple but fairly challenging work is nothin to sneeze at. Now if i can only adjust to working a first shift job, i'll be happy! I'm not a morning person by any shape or form. Well, amend that.......if i can get used to it i just might keep it this job, and be able to start Tai Chi again too. That i really want to do again....i need to do some stress relief like mad. That is prolly one of the best techniques i've ever run across. Gotta love the Asians that came up with that. Anyway.....off to chat and the usual rigamarole :D

2003-01-26T02:20:00.000-05:00

I"m sitting in a happy daze again. This time not from sex, but from sheer musical glee. I've gone to see Chicago, the film version of a Fosse stage production. Now i want to see that as it was portrayed on stage originally! Catherine Zeta Jones was incredible, pure sex appeal as the characater demanded....when you play a speakeasy singer like that. :D Renee Zeleweger(sp?) was alright, but she's not the major talent like ZetaJones is in it. Richard Gere was the complete suprise though, damned good on his own, he actually tap danced quite well too. When they present a trial like a Three Ring Circus and the Defense Lawyer like the Ringmaster, you can't help but love it! *grins evilly* Mr. Gere's first number was pure burlesque though...so much fun to watch.
I agree with Samb39 though, the best number by far was Cellblock Tango. Six women telling how they got there....
To quote them 'He had it comin, he had it comin! He only had himself to blame...if youda been there, if you'da seen it, i'm sure that you'd have done the same!' Can't help but love a line like that. Not only a great song, but the visuals were stunning....creative use of red silk hankerchiefs too. I'm NOT telling...go watch the movie. So THERE!
I come home to musical genius too. Found yet another japanese band to rave about. Do As Infinity, they do the 2nd ending to Inu Yasha on the series. Gorgeous vocals and purely great sounding songs, even if i can't understand a damned word of japanese. That so far makes two or three to my list of favorite japanese singers. Aside from Akino Arai, i can't remember the exact names of the rest but they surpass justabout every american and british singer that i know in vocal quality. Something about the tone just melts me.
Anyway, i think i'll go back to bliss....since i do intend to burn these japanese songs for my listening pleasure at work. I also bought the Chicago soundtrack on friday, actually worth my 14$. If the recording industry would release decent artists i wouldnt' be lookin to japan for great artists. Chicago on it's own is a rarity, Hollywood hasnt' released a really good musical in years on end. I could keep listening to this stuff again and again. Now why am i babbling, go buy it or see the movie! As for the japanese stuff...it's an aquired taste...either watch Inu Yasha and see what i mean at the end credits--or forget what i said and dismiss it. Either way...enjoy some decent music for once. I know i am :D

2003-01-07T22:18:00.000-05:00

I'm wondering whether i should change the name of this blog? Songs From Westgate works out....but i'm beginning to think i should call it Karma By The Week. Here's why........
I'm working on a typical monday, orders in the network just queueing up and the rest of us in my 20 odd man/woman team are pluggin away at them. Suddenly i've got a tingling feeling in my abdomen, which within five minutes leaves me lightheaded and faint.
No warning, no reasoning to it either. Think it's a panic attack? I should be so lucky!
The lightheadedness goes away, and the feeling faint bit too. I' m wheezing away though...it's like the tingling in my abdomen just tightened up and i DO mean tightened up. I"d called my team leader within the first five minutes of feeling faint, but wheezing won't pass. Meanwhile i'm doing my best to relax, but it doesn't work...so they call an ambulance for me. I'm in no condition to drive to the hospital, not when i can't breathe right. I know by then it's another asthma attack, i just wish i knew what caused it this time. It usually takes quite a few things to get this started, these episodes are so rare it's been about 2 yrs since my last severe bout with it.
I'm bundled into the ambulance, with the little nostril oxygen feeds they use. Quiet ride to the nearest hospital. To cut it short, i basically spend a few hours being monitored for air intake and heart rate too(since the tightness around my chest persisted). I got my third inhaler in my lifetime now. Right by my side at all times, since i'm still breathing kinda light.
The good thing is, i'm okay. The bad part is, yet MORE bills to take care of...when they arrive. I wish i knew why it started so far after my teens for me. It didint' start till i was in my 20s at that! Shortly after the 2nd occurrance of bronchitus in my life, the first was before i was 2 yrs of age. It seems like that may have triggered it, between that and some type of allergy i've not a clue about. All i know is usually about once a year i get a bout where i need an inhaler nearby, and this was one of them. Yet i didnt' have one. The bronchitus i got in september was easily cured, but i didtn' need an inhaler then. I'm barely coughing now, mostly just sniffling and wishing i wasn't so tired.
Anyway, work went well....got a lot of emails from everyone on the floor that saw me get bundled out yesterday. It's good to know i work with so many good people. Also for the ones that i work with to worry so much to get that ambulance(and they'll pay that bill too since they called it). I think it'll be mostly relaxing for the next few days and getting all my lung capacity back. The good thing about data entry where i work, is very little phone work. I can spend most of the time relaxing physically while workin my mind on the job, which is pretty much ideal :D I've got the good parts, i just wish i knew what was bringin on all this chaos. Oh well, take it all....it's still leaves me with a very unboring life.

2002-12-27T23:18:00.000-05:00

Almost 2 weeks later and boy have things gotten silly.
I got the DVD player i wanted for christmas, but i was happier ot visit the family. Even got to see my best friend and get an idea on when she's finally getting married. She sat around in a bit of a daze, but i would to with a diamond on my hand.*grins*
To make it even funnier, my cousin also has set a date for her wedding. So....the older cousin gets to be a bridesmade come Sept 2, 2003! Haha...this should be fun. I'll have to find time to get down for at least one fitting and then make it there for the wedding and rehearsal. Hopefully i'll be able to use vacation time by then. Either way, it'll be great.
Now i'm mostly just chilling out, the bills have stacked up and i've got a very small paycheck sneaking up on me since i did't get holiday pay for christmas day. And i dont' get it for new years either. Time to be a miser again till i get things straightened out, but it can be done. Sometime in the next week i gotta get out and buy pots pans, cookie sheets....and spices and stuff. One of my other presents was a Cookbook. So i can start experiementing on stuffs to cook for myself!! i can NOT live on takeout and microwave fodder much longer. I'm not so dumb as to burn water or explode a hard boild egg(yet another cousin did that stunt). I just want decent cooked or possibly baked stuff i can take to work with me :D
Not too much to ask, since i'll be doing it for myself. One roommate isn't here long enough to worry about food, and i'm sure his girlf feeds him. The other one lives on takeout. Even the preprocessed cook it yourself stuff is better sometimes! ......
For now, i better stop or i'm gonna get hungry again!
Get the bills paid..yes it's prosaic--but it's needed and after that, i can really start experimenting. Since i dont' have to argue over the pots and pans with a psychotic housewife.
Ooooooh. Speaking of food....i think i'll raid that bit of ham that i brought back from our christmas feast. Heh ;-)

2002-12-13T23:55:00.000-05:00

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2002-12-13T22:04:00.000-05:00

Let me tell you a little story.
It begins last year, late april of 2001. A girl goes with hope and anticipation to see a certain man she cares about across the ocean, going from michigan to london, england. She has hopes that the strained feelling that has persisted the last few months can be solved, since it's usually easier to talk in person than on a phone line. It's always been that way with them.
She learns wrong, after confronting her man about a nasty rumor that he'd been cheating on her wiht some other woman. It doesn't help that she's wearing a beautiful imperial blue sapphire that that very same man had sent her in christmas of 2000 either.
Within 48 hours of that initial confrontation she's basically dumped, in england and no way home for 5 days. The man is polite enough to still show her around and talk with her. But he turns to stone at night, no feelings....shutting himself off. The man is not that smart either, he holds her hand during the days 'cause you looked so sad' he says later on. That really mixes the signals, stone at night, polite and somewhat caring durning the day. She goes home on time, back to michigan. Cries her eyes out for a couple of weeks, then gets on with her life. Particularly after confronting that man again when he's in michigan on his usual business--working at kids summer camps. He manages to look like a deer caught in the headlights when she walks into his line of site. The girl gets her own digs in, after all...it's only fair, he tore her heart in the spring. She did add that after a while, she'd be willing to talk again, be actual friends. But in the end she knows it'll be him initiating any talking again, since drives home to go on more completely with her life and maybe get accepted to university.
She does get that acceptance letter a few months later, then it takes another year--but she moves across the state to the nearest large city by her school. No word from that man.....it's been over a year since the initial breakup, she has no thought of him talking to her again. Particularly this soon. Two months into her stay....he PMs her in a chat room, says hi and the usual overtures. She askes immediately--got a girlfirend yet? No answer....he only asks about her. Fast forward another month or so...at that time she gets a little relief from a certain DirtyBlondCutie. The Exboyfriend comes on and talks with her again..she's happy to tell him about it at the time, and once again she asks 'do you have a girlfriend?' No answer.....now she knows friends usually discuss this thing, but he's avoiding stuff. All she gets out of him is that he's living in Detroit now and working for one of their newspapers. Nothing else at all.
Another month or so goes by, the fling with DirtyBlondCutie was short, but satisfying. She gets back from work to find a few offline messages on her puter account. She fires off an email to him. Gets a bit short, but scathing. Telling him that friends do share--she may have posted the DirtyBlondCutie thing online and that's the only reason she tells him about it. It IS public knowledge, after all, not just cause she wanted to answer his questions. He answers back, vague flirting this time...but not one answer. She's annoyed and irritated. Finally she gives him a work email so she can end it without having to wait 24 hours between emails. Since the 2nd email got no better answer. She tells him to either tell her what he wants outta this conversation, or go away. He does, to her utter relief. She always thought she'd want that man back, but after this....she knows he's hiding something. Possibly even married as a few have suggested. Since he would try to evade the obvoius question, 'do you have a girlfriend?'. Evaded, squirmed in every possible way..and then wanted to know about her sex life.
That ex boyfriend is no longer mature in her eyes, not even smart. He apparently thought she was dumb enough to pick up like it was the old days. You really can't do that when you've been dumped 3000 miles from home, it's sticks too close to the heart. The girl is me, the man is my exboyfriend. I just find it suspicious that he wont' tell me shit--then expects me to tell all. I'm younger than him--but i'm NOT stupid. I'm actually glad it happened, now i'm not always hoping he'll come back. If he reads this--and there's a good chance he will(you know exactly who you are) you might want to think on what friendship means. How we actually shared stuff before we became a couple--which now means shit cause he refused that aspect of friendship from almost the first of this new set of contacts. I'm done, i've my life and you will never be the center of it until you grow up. I on the other hand...have infinite possiblities and time to explore them. New town, new job....and i'm even stronger than when i was you.
Sorry, everyone else..i had to get that outta my system. As you can see...it's not quite 2 yrs later after that nasty split and i'm still a bit sore. It has to be said one way or another. Other than that..i'm enjoying my life now, which is for me and i have a chance of finding one person that will share with me, the way he used to. But for now--i'm gonna live and have a lot of fun doing it too. More than i had when i was worried about him too much. He wasn't the center of my life, but he came pretty close. I was still myself througout that 3 yrs together though and remember them fondly--but that parting was more than bittersweet. I learned from it...who knows if he did. For now....Hello University and i can't wait to start. Three years of meeting others and learning stuff to get me where i WANT to go. As they say now, w00000000t!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2002-12-04T21:28:00.000-05:00

The move is over, thank the gods!!!!!!!!!
I"m now in the new abode adn it's not to bad, if smaller. But at least i'm sleeping through the night again. Now if this cold would go away i'd be happy. Yes, i got yet another cold! dammit dammit dammit. It's always stress too.....worried about the job, worried about that. Back to work tommorrow at least.....i had to leave early today since i was getting chills while bundled up in a sweater andand my winter coat while in front of the puter. Then to top it off, the new roomie's have it at least 70 F in here and i'm still gettng chills. Basically came home, ate took some cold medicine and aleve to break the fever. Not done much else.....
I do want to work though, i don't feel like being bored outta my skull and broke yet again. This job is almost tailor made to my tastes too. Data entry with music and food :D Cant' beat that in any way, now can you?
Oh, i should talk about the new roomies. Chris is pretty cool, italian guy....even fluent in the language, fairly well cultured too. Dating a cop, which makes it hilarious in it's own way. Alan strikes me as the 30 yr old couch potato, i spend more time reading or working. He spends it in front of the tv. UGh..oh well. Long as he makes the rent, i'm not complaining too much. I'm waiting till this cold is outta my system before i see Die Another Day, but i did go see Treasure Planet this weekend. It's very kewl...great retelling of a good story. Excellent visuals too.....Disney is learning, even if they dont' break the box office anymore. I think most of it was the timing of the release, too. Not the best time to release a film when you compete with a James Bond flick and then LOTR:Two Towers in less than 2 weeks. I intend to have tickets for that weekend by the end of THIS week. No if's ands or buts about it. I love the fact that the big films attract advance ticket sales now. Now that i'm working it's even better too...i can afford to go! What's even funnier is that i'm less than a block away from one of the many theaters in this town....and they are cushy jobs too. Stadium seating and all!
Anyway, off to chat for about an hour or so more...then i'm gonna attempt to sleep again. Right now it's the only thing that's gonna break this light fever.

2002-11-24T00:34:00.000-05:00

Okay, a week later and things have improved lots. I got an apology from the roomie. That doesnt' mean i'm staying though....
It just means i'll be civil even when i do talk to them. Mostly i've mewed myself up in this room after work.and considering the hours i work not much else i can do but come home, watch a bit of TV and then back to bed. Granted, the money is good and they like me there! Laid back place...fun loving crew and we order lunch constantly. Gotta love that :D
The only thing i dont' like is the length of time i gotta drive..getting up at 6am just to make it to work at 8am for the saturday shifts--UGH! Then i dont' get outa there till about 5pm, basically up before the sun rises and not out till it's setting. I"m just looking forward to sleeping in tommorrow, that's for sure.
The new prospective roomie has potential, mostly cause aside from a worry about illegal hobbie, which i have few to none--and the one i do have is not a constant thing. Basically he understands i can room there for about 6 months, till il'm ready to get into the 1 room i was eyeing before. I also get to pay less to stay there too, good bye bills! heh
Well not entirely, but it'll give me time to find out if i'll get hired by this company instead of just being a temp agent, and also get rid of the worst of my new debts. Which is my driving need right now, i'll see about one or two classes....but i doubt i'll be able to find any that'll go with 11.30am to 8pm hours. Freaked out hours yes, but the company HQ is in california and this is michigan.....and guess who gets priority? Ah why am i complaining.....i'll have money and with any luck i'll be able to start clubbing...maybe go catch Sevendust next month and attend that huge party at the Buckin' Beaver, heard they gotta great DJ for it.
First things first though, MOVE! :))
Belated update on DirtyBlondCutie, he's outta the picture. He apparently liked my current roommates sister long before i was around and she just broke up with her last boyf. So he's outta the picture, which is a good thing i it's way ....but i got what i wanted and mostly needed. There's always more guys. *Grins evilly*

2002-11-16T03:48:00.000-05:00

Well, when things fall apart, they sure do go to hell in handbasket.
Gotta love this, my roomie shows her paranoid side yesterday night. Quite fun when i spend all night on the puter trying to calm myself down after being accused of basically 'trespassing' into a room that holds no interest to me. I seldom get mad, but i always get mad when i know i'm right. Mom said it looks like i'm guilty when i do that, but i can't help it. I dont' scream but i do raise my voice! Which is done without breaking a sweat but can carry through the whole damned house. Thank you vocal training.
Oh well, i'm at the parents, getting my sanity back until monday or tuesday. Then i go back and begin the search for a new room. I dont' think i can afford an apartment of my own yet. The good side is, i'm back home for a little while visiting my kitty cat(the Velvet maniac) and i get to go clubbing to get rid of the rest of this tension. Back with the old home group and off to freestyle with glowsticks to the best tunes around in both canada and the usa. :-D
I'd tell the whole story, but at this point i'll wait till after sunday night. I'm tired and about ready to go to bed. In fact, i think i'll do that. Much needed at this point, since the married couple i live with is intent on making my life living hell. I dont' intend to stay long and they'll only get rent in parts since i'm moving out as soon as another place is located and scouted out. Dontcha love the irony of this? I get a job finally--but the roommate decides to get stupid within a day of it. Get a job, now i gotta find a home.......lovely.
Anyway....the bed is calling!

2002-11-14T21:09:00.000-05:00

Finally, something good comes along.
I'm nearly at the end of my rope and money is running along. Then my temp agency calls: we got something for ya--and no interview required! HaHa! Now i'm ready....first day is this coming wensday. The hours are weird but i'll get full time work and money. All i want, even the option of overtime too.
Now if DirtyBlondCutie wasn't so uncertain it'd be perfect. Oh well, can't be perfect all the time, and we're still friends which i'd rather have.Than to end up getting too attatched to him then fighting and destroying all of it. Looking forward to working, that's all i know...then maybe he'll get around to figuring himself out a bit. He came by tonight to visit and gods, gods gods...i still want him too much. Even though i do have to behave myself! Now if there was a way to not make him guilty anymore, but childhood training is hard to leave behind in any way,and he's not the Limey who didn't give a damn. I'm patient, but in some things i dunno if i want to wait. I'll have to..he's too nice a guy to hurt.

2002-11-12T02:23:00.000-05:00

I'm getting tired of these melancholy days, dammit!
Once again...i'm tired, annoyed and getting the distinct impression i'm not wanted in this home. I should have had a job by now, i put in applications all week and no one hires me--what the fuck am i suppposed to do about a shitty job market? Sorry bout the language, but it's about all that describes my feelings. I"ll just describe the day a bit.
I start out on an appointment at family planning to get some birth control pills, not just cause i'm active again either. Get home, chill out. I may have slightly annoyed the roomie by bringing the phone up again, and i do want to use my own phone--but there's also the fact of do i want to spend more money on getting even a cheap one? I HATE being jobless dammit
Then i find out she's been upstairs after i left for that appointment too, i dont' leave major messes(as in no mold) but i keep some stuff up here cause i reuse it, like cups and stuff. I bring it down to wash it on my own, like she asked....it's just enough after all that bullshit about the phone being upstairs--to get that too. I haven't said anything but i'm debating on whether i should or not. I don't like being nitpicked, i dont' say anything on the way she keeps house(which is perfectly fine with me). Her husband is just getting on my nerves, i can't help i do nothing. I put in applications, hope for an answer....then get nothing.
DirtyBlondCutie is feeling guilty. Which i don't blame him. He's still dealing with the beginnings of sexual relations...even casual. I'm only his second, we're friends and all but he wants to sort himself out. Still dealing with tossing out his strict chrisitan upbringing. I think it'll work out, so i'm quite happy to respect that. It takes a lot to deal with it, particularly when you first start out..i've had 10 yrs to figure out my own head this far in that subject and experiences. He still wants it, but he's so nice he wants to be sure of himself at least. The lust is still mutual, that's for sure..i'm still practically panting after the boy. Why am i saying boy? :D He's 3 months older than me, dontcha' just love silly things like that?
I need another trip home, and i just might too. A little bit of time to myself with my cat and my family--even if my little brother is being a dickhead. Maybe even go clubbing with the old gang--they can buy the drinks. *laughs*
I just needed to vent...by weeks end i should either be gone to the parents abode across the state--or know for sure i have a job. Either way...back to the keyboard again.

2002-11-04T02:57:00.000-05:00

Almost 3am here, and i'm not sleepy..least not yet anyway. Woke the roomies up this morning with the exertions with DirtyBlondCutie, fun but the next time we go to his house. Which we'll have all to ourselves...can't get any better than that. :D

Now in addition to all this, i make my way to the unemployment office, cause if i can get money out of the govt while trying to track down a job, all the better. I dont' want to have to draw on it for long--but money is money and i need it to make rent and bills. Faster i get a job, the better.....that is for sure. Then maybe i'll see if i can't get over to the temp agency during this week. I wish i had more to post on this time, but that's about all i'm concerned with. The melancholy i had is gone, bout as far away as it could go at this point and i can't be any happier! Now if this plan works out, things may go much better from here. I'm not getting my hopes up, but it's nice to be positive again, very nice feeling.

2002-11-01T21:10:00.000-05:00

Suprise surpise, just when it thought it would get worse, it gets better. I go through one of the most discouraging days, starting out by missing that bank teller test by 15 minutes, mostly cause the stupid silly small town girl go thuroughly LOST. So last chance, next thursday. Then i try to find a couple of other places, and get even more lost...nice way to was 2 hours worth of gas. Had to refill my gas tank while i was on my way back. Got out, chilled out and got some food....then guess who turns up later? The Dirty Blond Cutie. Me, the cutie and the roomie are playin darts later on, drinkin a bit....generally havin fun. Once again he flashes me and the roomie. He's got a nice ass to match that nicely hung front *grins evilly* Needless to say, by nights end...we decided to watch Heavy Metal, since he's never seen the original 1981 movie. We watched, out goes the lights....and HELLO!.
Turns out the feeling was mutual. Just didn't expect to find out This soon! Ah well, all for the best i think. I"m still out of a job, but the other frustration is gone and i'm typing this in happy daze, after a lazy....fun day. Haven't even bothered to get dressed yet. I'll do that tommorrow. When in the usual hyperactivity of those still in their 20s, we're planning much MORE of the same..later on of course, after the belated halloween bash and bonfire is out of the way.
At this point, i can't think of much else, now if i can get this kinda luck in the job hunt..my time here will be very interesting before i start classes in january.

2002-10-28T01:10:00.000-05:00

One month later, still no job. Life is crazy as usual isn't it? More than 5 interviews later and nothings biting. I refuse to give up though, particularly since i test for a bank teller job on Thursday, and i'm awaiting word on a 2nd interview with another company. This other company is actually salaried for the entry level job. I actually passed the initial interview, now if i get both the secondary ones nailed down..hello not being broke for the extent of my university stay! It's a great thought, and with any luck i just might get that job. I'm not stupid enough to depend on landing that lucrative position though, i looked in the want ads for a few more leads and i got 'em. Once again on the phones and printing out the dreaded resume thingy.
Social life is still a bit stark and isolated, though not so badly in my mind. Doesnt' help i'm not drooling over the buddy of my roomie. He's about my age if not the same, tall lean dirty blond. I forget the eye color at this point...but he's fun to look at. Runs his own little garage and sells cars, which isn't bad at all. He's even had the smidgen of miliary experience too, and he can hold up a conversation. Now i think it's mostly hormones talking, but even a fling on it it's own would be nice. A pleasant diversion after about 2 years worth of drought ;-) Maybe it's time i got out and had some fun again. I'm not much of a flirt, but even the roomies noticed that i had noticed him. Isnt' lust FUN :D
We'll see, a fellow chatter pointed out that a friend of mine would be potentially good thing too, even at a long distance. I slept on the idea and it seems fairly good. For now i just need a job, start class and then i can figure it out from there. Aside from all the drooling i can do over the university pretty boys--then brush 'em off cause they act like idiots(which i never did in high school...my how things have changed for the mousy bookworm!) Gotta love the way life works, eh?

2002-09-27T01:31:00.000-04:00

Okay, 2nd attempt tonight. Lovely time for the server to conk out too.
Still jobless, a bit moody and hoping i get contacted. Background checks should be done by now... had the interview done on tuesday, two interviews in fact. It'd be nice if i wasn't up till dawn and then have nothing to do with the rest of my day. I like my roommates, but i'm not as interested i some aspects of things as they are. I"ve never been an outdoors girl, and here what do i move in with? A lifeling hunter and his mechanic wife, ain't life silly like that.
Now if i wasn't feeling so much isolated and so much unlike them, i'd be better. Every now and then i get these days where i fell so unlike everyone. Afraid of ending up the smart spinster older sister to my brother, simply cause as a woman being intelligent is still somewhat intimidating to the garden variety guy. Reading most of the Ender Saga from Orson Scott Card don't help either. I'm nearly halfway through Shadow of the Hegemon right now. Great books but i could have been one of those geniuses if i wanted to apply myself, never did though.....mostly sheer boredom with the school system, with a few minor exceptional classes and teachers. I really need to get a job, start socializing again don't i?
I feel about as isolated as Ender himself sometimes, simply cause i'm book smart. But then i never was one for joining the in crowd either. The few times i tried that, it ended up in depression and loads of self hatred. Everyone longs for it..i've grown out of the worst of it now, by 25 yrs old. The longing never ends though....it just hangs in rags and tatters cause it's always shown as the 'right' thing to have in this society.
Okay enough self flagelization(is that how it's said?),
Tommorrow should tell different, but then...doesn't it always?

2002-09-25T01:33:00.000-04:00

Well, I got into the blog thing. As i sit here about 300 miles from home, it amazes me still 6 weeks later that i went through with it and actually MOVED. Nothing else has been so life altering for me since boot camp at 17. No movies rented, though i wait with more than a little impatience for both the Two Towers in December to hit theaters, and also Spirited Away. That's the new movie from the director of Princess Mononoke, and it looks to be just as steeped in japanese lore as the last.
If i got that job after 2 hours worth of applications and interviews at Target, i'll actually be happy! Then i can start looking for clubs to visit again, and movies. I miss going to the theaters more than a little right now. Whether i had company or not, having a cheap roommate that doesn't let his wife go to movies cause they are 'broke' is no fun.
Just maybe i'll start Aikido, i'll be able to make a finaly decision once i know my budget. If i'm workin midnight stocking shelves it'll be ideal till i start classes in january.
Anyway, enough with the idle chatter......when i have somethin to say we'll see.